I chose the Disney character Mushu, from the movie Mulan, for my allusion poem.
Allusion Poem (Mushu)
Small and slim easily describe me,
Talkative and funny is what I can be.
It doesn’t matter on my height or size,
As long as I know I have all my pride.
I can be a little hard-headed and stubborn,
But through all my mistakes I definitely learn.
The People in my life who made a good cause and effect,
are actually the ones that I love and protect.
I tend to get distracted and wander in outer space,
But one of things I do best is put a smile on your face.
I’m not a God, warrior, or barbarian,
But I know I can be a good and wise guardian.
Hey Leo.
ReplyDeleteSo first off, I'd like to say that your poem is kind of all over the place? I don't know how to explain it but I feel that your poem is kind of too simple? But it's okay though, it's only a rough draft so you can improve. But I really like the ending of your poem when you said "I'm not a God, warrior, or barbarian, But I know I can be a good and wise guardian"
Hi Leo. Good start on this rough draft. I really like the way your poem rhymes. ^^ While reading the poem, I could picture you easily. However, I couldn't catch who your allusion was until the end of the poem: "I’m not a God, warrior, or barbarian, But I know I can be a good and wise guardian".
ReplyDeleteYou can use a lowercase 'g' because it's the proper way to spell gods and goddesses, I guess. o.o
My suggestion to you in improving this poem is incorporating more of Mushu? You can put "dragon" somewhere just as long as it fits? But yeah...including a few more hints of Mushu and you're good to go. Good luck on your final! =)
-Desiree